Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas

Yes, I am posting on Christmas Day. But i`m using my Wii to do it.

Does that make me more or less of a saddo? hmm.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Thump thump thump

Today has been a day of recovery.
In both mind and body.

Which sounds kinda cool and mystical and stuff.
But in reality it just means I drank way too much on the works piss up last night.

Evil Smirnoff Ice.

But I think my self is starting to forgive me for the 7 hours I made it down copious amounts of vodka. Although the hour or so playing Wii Sports this afternoon did cause a slight setback in the recovery process.

Anybody else reading this got their Wii's yet? no? Nobody wanna exchange Wii addresses? No? Anybody still playing Animal Crossing? And when I say anybody I mean you Carto? hmm? hmm?

I think it's official. Me n Zara are complete Nintendo fanboys, er girls, er people. You've not lived if you haven't experienced Zara in full flow playing boxing. It's a scary sight. I fear for my safety now.

So yeah. We're having fun. Christmas is going great so far. Life is feeling good.

I'm a happy bunny.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006



Yes & yessss!

I`m not leaving the house ever again.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Cake Tuesday

Yes i've taken over Cake Tuesday. This is my festive attempt at cake decoraing with a LOT of guidance from Zara.

Ho Ho Ho

Monday, December 18, 2006

Birthday Facts

A few facts only I will probably be interested in regarding my brother. I've changed a few words to past tense.

Your date of conception was on or about 27 March 1972 which was a Monday.

You were born on a Monday
under the astrological sign Sagittarius.
Your Life path number is 4.

Life Path Compatibility:
You were most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 4, 8, 11 & 22.
You should have got along well with those with the Life Path numbers 6 & 7.
You were least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 3, 5 & 9.

The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2441669.5.
The golden number for 1972 is 16.
The epact number for 1972 is 14.
The year 1972 was a leap year.

Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/15/1972 and ending 2/2/1973.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Rat.

Your Native American Zodiac sign is Owl; your plant is Mistletoe.

You were born in the Egyptian month of Menchir, the second month of the season of Poret (Emergence - Fertile soil).

Your date of birth on the Hebrew calendar is 13 Tevet 5733.
Or if you were born after sundown then the date is 14 Tevet 5733.

The Mayan Calendar long count date of your birthday is which is
12 baktun 17 katun 19 tun 7 uinal 5 kin

The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Monday, 12 Dhi'l-Qa'dih 1392 (1392-11-12).

The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 2 April 1972.
The date of Orthodox Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 9 April 1972.
The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 16 February 1972.
The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 21 May 1972.
The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 28 May 1972.
The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Saturday, 9 September 1972.
The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Thursday, 30 March 1972.
The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 15 February 1972.

As of 12/18/2006 2:12:34 PM EST
You should be 34 years old.
You should be 408 months old.
You should be 1,774 weeks old.
You should be 12,418 days old.
You should be 298,046 hours old.
You should be 17,882,772 minutes old.
You should be 1,072,966,354 seconds old.

Celebrities who share your birthday:
Christina Aguilera (1980) Katie Holmes (1978) Earl 'DMX' Simmons (1970)
Rob Van Dam (1970) 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin (1964) Brad Pitt (1963)
Leonard Maltin (1950) Steven Spielberg (1946) Keith Richards (1943)
Ossie Davis (1917) Douglas Fraser (1916) Betty Grable (1916)
Ty Cobb (1886)

Top songs of 1972
The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face by Roberta Flack
Alone Again (Naturally) by Gilbert O'Sullivan
American Pie by Don McLean
Without You by Nilsson
I Can See Clearly Now by Johnny Nash
A Horse with No Name by America
Baby Don't Get Hooked On Me by Mac Davis
Me and Mrs. Jones by BillyPaul
The Candy Man by Sammy Davis, Jr.
Lean On Me by Bill Withers

Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 4.86027397260274 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)

There would be 365 days till your next birthday
on which your cake should have had 35 candles.

Those 35 candles produce 35 BTUs,
or 8,820 calories of heat (that's only 8.8200 food Calories!) .
You can boil 4.00 US ounces of water with that many candles.

In 1972 there were approximately 3.7 million births in the US.
In 1972 the US population was approximately 203,302,031 people, 57.4 persons per square mile.
In 1972 in the US there were approximately 2,158,802 marriages (10.6%) and 708,000 divorces (3.5%)
In 1972 in the US there were approximately 1,921,000 deaths (9.5 per 1000)
In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds.
In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds.

Your birthstone is Blue Zircon

The Mystical properties of Blue Zircon

Zircon helps one be more at peace with oneself.

Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)

Blue Topaz, Ruby, Lapis Lazuli

Your birth tree is

Fig Tree, the Sensibility

Very strong, a bit self-willed, independent, does not allow contradiction or arguments, loves life, its family, children and animals, a bit of a butterfly, good sense of humour, likes idleness and laziness, of practical talent and intelligence.

There are 7 days till Christmas 2006!
There are 20 days till Orthodox Christmas!

The moon's phase on the day you were
born was waxing gibbous.

Birth day

I can't sleep. Which means Zara can't sleep.

I had a whole post floating around in my head. Which somehow feels like cheating. Should posts always be spontaneous?

Well, when Zara dreams it's like a full on theatrical production. She really should write them down. Or blog them.

So I've had the full on blockbuster version of Zara's dream and now my post has dribbled out my ears. I'm not complaining, or blaming Zara. Just saying where my head is right now. Which might be a good thing. My original post might have sounded a little contrived.

Damn, I really want to post more. My head is now empty of all thoughts. There was so many of them bouncing around in my head at 6am.

So, here I lay. On the settee with a blanket round me, in the dark, with the fire slowly cooking me. The low hum of the laptop, the sound of our rats snuffling around in the background.

It feels safe and warm. Which is how I want to be as inside I feel empty.

Urgh, there's one of those cliched lines.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Oh Lordy. Nobody tell Miaow!

You Are: 60% Dog, 40% Cat

You are a nice blend of cat and dog.
You're playful but not too needy. And you're friendly but careful.
And while you have your moody moments, you're too happy to stay upset for long.

Sunday, December 10, 2006


Sigh. So the 8th December came n went with no sign of the wii.

Which I knew would happen. But you always live in hope. But we did get part of our order.

Yes, we now have the extra controller and Wii Play to, er, practice swinging around in the living room in anticipation of the arrival of our little bundle of nintendo goodness.

So right now i'm soaking in the bath. No surprise there. Working up the energy to tackle the Christmas decorations. Which may seem early to some. But considering half our street looks like Blackpool illuminations then our few coloured lights and little tree will be nothing to look at.

I'm feeling Christmasy now. I think the Port n lemonade we had earlier went a long way to put me in the Christmas spirit.

We are SO ready for Christmas. Nearly all the presents have been bought. All put a couple being bought online. The food is in, the booze is in. Just 5 more little work days to go for me then it can begin.

This is gonna be such a long week!

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Ding dong the muppets gone

Well the obviously very mature 26 year old has thrown his toys out his pram and gone stomping off into the sunset.

After a week of his fuck ups he got a verbal warning which had him crying to his girlfriend. And after he was burped and put to bed early he came in today to face us like a man.

Then scribbled his resignation on a scrap of paper. And went.

And whilst I was at home on my dinner break, damnit.

Sigh I miss all the fun.

No doubt that won't be the last we hear of him. He's the sort to cause trouble and will probably cry that he was treated unfairly. Yeah, so, we hated the twat. No need to take is so personally eh.

That's what happens when you refuse to take responsibility for your own actions.

I'm tempted to post his profile link on here. But he's not worth the hassle really if he ever found out. Well, we'll see. Depends on how much he pisses us off.

Which will be nothing compared to the broken legs he'll have if certain people catch up with him. So it'll not be like he'll be running after me.

Ooh, this is turning nasty. I'm tired. He walked out leaving us well and truly in the shit at work.

Yeah, nice on muppet.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

it's a festive thing!

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
Hot Chocolate

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
Wraps them.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?

4. Do you hang mistletoe?

5. When do you put your decorations up?
When Zara says so

6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)?
Anything with Alcohol

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child:
Going through mum's catalogue writing our Christmas present list. Although this process usually started in July!

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
Hmm, what do you mean?

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
If i'm allowed to.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
Quickly, and with a bit of arguing usually.

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it?
Love it, as long as I don't have to drive in it.

12. Can you ice skate?
Badly, yes.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift?

14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you?
Time off work. Oh ok, and family

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?
Something with chocolate, and cream...and alcohol.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
Getting pissed

17. What tops your tree?
Garfield usually! Although this year i'm sure it'll be a rat.

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving?
Receiving...gimme presents, gimme, gimme, gimme!

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song?
Wish it could be Christmas everyday - Wizard

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum?

21. Favorite Christmas movie?
A Christmas Carol, 1951 version with Alastair Sim

22. What do you leave for Santa?
A mess

Monday, December 04, 2006

Money money money

Yeah, it's Monday.
Yeah, my back still aches like mad.
And...yeah. I've had enough of work already.

But, it's Ebay night!

In about two and a half hours my 'Vintage' Lego item auctions will end. And my paypal account will be looking nice n healthy.

Who says money can't buy you happiness?

It's not gonna be enough to retire on, but it'll make Christmas very merry. I already sold my PS2 to make way for the Wii. And got a nice warm fuzzy feeling by accepting less than I wanted so a little boy would get what he wanted on his birthday.

Aah. Yeah, she coulda been spinning me a tale, but. What the hell. It was my good deed for this year in the hope that our Wii will arrive before Christmas.

Clocking up the overtime at work. Getting paid for my little job on the side, and selling on Ebay.

Yep, money makes me pretty damn happy.

Thursday, November 30, 2006



That was the week flying by. Can't believe it's 5 days since my last post. Dr whatshischops on Brain Training won't be happy with me either as I haven't trained my brain for a week.

Thank you all for your kinds words, and messages as to my whereabouts. I was inundated with emails /sarcasm

Been working too damned hard this week so my mood is less than stellar. Hence my need to take it out on the keyboard.

So I will start with a Fuuuuckkkk You, and work my way up.

The Boss, even whilst being away on holiday is still managing to fuck things up. The muppet, despite my strongest nightly prayers is still 'working' for us. And i've had more work this past week than I have all year.

Still, as from next Monday i'll be starting the big 2 week countdown until I start my holiday. And i'm more than ready for a few weeks of constant binging and nightly piss ups. The spare room is chocca with Christmas goodies. I've pretty much done my present buying. Thanks in no small part to

So now it's t-minus 18 days and counting.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

What a week!

I didn't think this week could drum up any more madness until I went round to my parents house to find that my mum had taken a tumble in town and knocked her front teeth out!

She felt very self conscious and I tried not to look. But it really shook me up. It shows that my parents are vulnerable. Especially my mum. And that it's slowly heading towards the time where I have to look out for them.

I'm probably making them sound a lot older than they actually are. Which isn't really the point I'm trying to make. But it's one of those things you don't consider until something like this happens.

Both my parents are fighting fit, my dad goes flying every moment he can. My mum travels to her mother's house for visits. But it shows, all it needs is one trip, one tumble.

I know it can happen to anybody at anytime of life. But they're my parents. They're my life. Even though i'm going on 37 they're a big part of me.

I know i'm settled in my own home with Zara and have our own life going on. But I sometimes wonder how vulnerable I will feel when I don't have my parents to turn to for guidance. Or just a shoulder to cry on.

If I can lose my brother before he managed to turn 30, then whose to say I can't lose my parents before their time either.

Damn, this is a depressing post.


Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Such is life

If you think you're having a crappy time of your life, then think again. If you've not heard of the Darwin Awards then go here. It'll make you smile about your own little life if nothing else!

The following mind-boggling attempt at a crime spree in Washington, DC appeared to be the robber's first (and last), due to his lack of a previous record of violence, and his terminally stupid choices:

1. His target was H&J Leather & Firearms, A gun shop specializing in handguns.

2. The shop was full of customers - firearms customers.

3. To enter the shop, the robber had to step around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door.

4. A uniformed officer was standing at the counter, having coffee before work. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up,and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, the police officer with a 9mm Glock 17, the clerk with a .50 Desert Eagle, assisted by several customers who also drew their guns, several of whom also fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt in the exchange of fire.

Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant Stefan 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally let it fly, and suffocated the keeper under 200 pounds of poop!

Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded on him. "The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant continued to evacuate his bowels on top of him" said flabbergasted Paderborn police detective Erik Dern. With no one there to help him, he lay under all that dung for at least an hour before a watchman came along. During that time he suffocated.

It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves that "Sh!t happens!"

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Cake Tuesday

Yes, yes. I know how long it`s been!

Sunday, November 19, 2006


Four weeks to go.
Four weeks until I finish work for Christmas.
Four weeks until I can stay in bed 24/7 out of this damn cold horrible weather and do nothing except play on my DS until the Wii arrives and then I'll have to get out of bed....

*deep breaths*

A big thank you to both Deanna and Carto for making me feel slightly better about the workrat situation. Only slightly better though. I always have to feel a little guilty about something.

Speaking of Carto, I got myself a new DS game yesterday. Ok, it was a tenuous link at best. So now i've been playing Animal Crossing like mad. I'm addicted already, and have managed to get Zara hooked too. Which didn't take very long this morning and meant my DS was hijacked to the point that the battery was dying.

So that'll be another friend code i'll have to add to the right hand side of this blog.

Hopefully it'll keep me going until our Wii arrives. Which won't be in the first batch destined for delivery on the 8 Dec...damnit. Still, gotta be better than following the sheep and buying a PS3 on ebay for at least 5 times the RRP...suckers.

Ok, enough of the boring geekdom I hear someone cry.

Which doesn't leave me with much to blog about. No doubt the ensuing week will kick up something to rant about as 'the muppet' attempts to do either himself or someone else some damage carrying glass around the factory.

Makes the day more....interesting.

Thursday, November 16, 2006


I'm ok now. I always feel ok with the world when i'm safe in my own home. With the curtains closed and the doors locked on these cold nights.

But out in the real world I don't often feel in control.

I'm weak willed
Weak minded.
Weak spirited.

An animal has probably died because of me, and I hate myself for it.

We have a rat at work, or rats. Or something that's chewing the cables and eating the left over food we discard.

I suggested a humane trap.
I just didn't hammer the point home that this was the right thing to do.

I was weak.

Pest control was brought in.
Poison was put down.
Now there is no sign of the little furry critter.

I had been putting bits of crisps down in my work room. And by morning these had been eaten.

So now the little guy is gone. And it's all down to me.

Our workplace had bought mousetraps. Mousetraps for fuck sake!
It'll maim it I said.
Nobody listened.
So I made sure I was the last to leave, and then made sure the traps didn't do any kind of damage.

So then the poison was put down.
And I did nothing.
I felt like I could do nothing.
I might as well have put the poison down myself.

I'm sorry to the little fella who had the misfortune to think our workplace was a safe refuge from the cold world.

But I guess at least he ate well whilst he stayed in my work room.

I'm just weak.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006


Poor little fella. Just had to blog this!

Monday, November 13, 2006


Never thought i'd say it, but finally the weekend is over.
It was 2 days of taking the wrong route on any decision.
If i'd gone to work on Saturday I wouldn't have wrecked my back helping with the pets.
If i'd gone and had my bath straight aways and not helped Zara in the kitchen we wouldn't have argued when we did and have a night feeling miserable.

Amazing, and quite scary how one little change in direction can set the whole of your day in a different light.

Wow, well there's my deep n meaningful moment out the way for today.

I've done my good deed for the day. A fly landed in my bathwater, so I fished it out and now it's sat next to me drying.

I really am a soft sod.

I might put the hair dryer on it in a while to help it out.


So I had a 'i hate my job' kinda day today. Which probably isn't helping my mood any, along with my back.

I need a break. Christmas is starting to take way too long to get here now. I've had enough of this year.

I need it to be in 5 weeks time, right now. 18th December. Happy Birthday brother. You would be. Should be 34. I start to get anxious, although really it's just another day.

But it's not.

Ok, I really don't know where i'm going with this train of thought. My head is all jumbled up.

So i'll leave it there.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Wii did it!

The end of another funny day.

A day of fun, laughter, arguing and stony silence.

Life would be so boring if it was any other way.

Finally gotten round to pre-ordering our Wii.

Now it's just the long wait until 8th December, and then hope we're in the first batch to be sent out.

I'm no good at waiting.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

My fellow DS owners.

Woo, 2 posts in one day. Aren't you lucky.

Anyway. Time magazine is currently poling for Gadget of the Year. The Nintendo DS is out in the lead.

Go here to cast your vote and make sure our favourite little friend wins.

People are dumb Pt 123456

Picture the scene.
In Manchester.
A bus only lane.
With bollards that lower to allow the buses to pass.
Now insert stupid car drivers.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Complaints department

Well. It looks like my posts have been missed considering all the subtle...and not so subtle messages i've been getting.

You know who you are!

I must admit I didn't realise how few times I was posting until I looked at the number of posts I made in january (40) and the number of posts I made last month (18). Less than half!

Which is quite amazing considering the amount of times the new guy at work pisses me off. Who from now on I shall refer to as 'muppet'

Who by now has had his stitches out from the time last week where he nearly lost his life and ended up stitches.

Yeah, cry me a river you wuss.

We've all been there. It's the joys with working with glass. Anyway, I found this amazing website where you can rant anonymously about a fellow coworker, and send them an I guess I know where i'll be going next!

And no, muppet. After telling you I have stuff like Iron Maiden, Nine Inch Nails and the like on my Ipod I don't like Michael fucking Jackson...sigh.

*deep breaths*

So, anyway. We all survived bonfire night. Miaow got a little spooked, but that's it over for another year. Yay.

Apart from that a pretty uneventful weekend. Apart from making Zara cry in the middle of Tesco. And then getting hateful looks off all the women in the store.

What a bastard I am.

Ok, I don't think I made her cry. She was in a mood. I was in a mood. Words were said. Tears were shed. It was just a whole mood thing.

So here I the bath, of course cos it's damn cold everywhere else in the house. Relaxed. Calm. Serene.

It'll soon be Christmas.

Oh yeah, and finally. For anybody who's as addicted to their DS as me. I'm gonna start putting my friend code on the right hand side. But for now here's the only came i've got with a friend code. Mario Kart DS 073096 316837.

Hope to see you on the track.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Young and old

Wow, friday already.
My posts are getting less and less I know. But I have a very good reason for that.
I'm lazy.

I don't know if i'm just getting bored with the whole blogging thing. Or i'm just too busy, well I mean the new series' of Stargate are on so that's Wednesday out the way completely.

And work is going...ok. I'm slightly detatched from the daily crisis going on around me in the knowledge that I'm getting extra money elsewhere with the possibility of it becoming a full time job. Maybe.

Time will tell. But all this extra cash does mean I can look forward to what free time I do have being spent infront of my DS or the impending purchase of our Wii. Must pre-order, must pre-order.

My brain age is currently 27 if anyone cares.

So it's good to know my mental state is quite young even if bodily I feel 90. Although I blame the weather on that.

Too. Damn, Cold.

For anybody, like me, who grew up in the 80s smoking, drinking and longing to have sex with anyone who vaguely showed and interest then this youtube video is for you.

Although it show none of the above it does show the items we grew up with and the things we saw on tv. A time when chocolate bars had proper names.

So enjoy. And i'll try and post more often.

Although I can't guarantee it'll be interesting, or make much sense as my brain tends to regress to that of a child the nearer to Christmas it gets.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Halloween

Hope you have a frightening night. Busy doing pumpkins now.

Nothing as scary as this though!

Monday, October 30, 2006

Circle of life

It's been a funny day.

Garfield kills pigeon.
Zara cooks pigeon.
Rats eat cooked pigeon.

Sometimes in life it's not good to be the pigeon.

Here endeth the lesson.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

A fine day

Today has been good.
Actually today has been fucking excellent.
It all started well by me n Zara beating each other.
Er, at Mario Kart DS and Tetris that is.

If I see another cool video showing off the Wii i'm gonna explode. Either that or Zara will really beat me!

So how was today also a good day.
Nicky Hayden only won the 2006 MotoGP championship. Woo
And woo again.
Also another reason for Zara to do me in as i've been like a kiddy in a candy/DS store.

Best. Race. Ever. Although I didn't actually watch much of the race. Instead I was glued to my laptop with the timing screen on.

Ok, I imagine none of you reading this has the faintest idea what i'm babbling on about.
But damnit. It's my blog , so I'll woo as much as I want.


Ok, i'm done now.

Not the most exciting news to many, not the most interesting thing I've got to say about my whole weekend. But it'll do for now.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

In the mood for a meme

A bit late to the party. But thought i'd give this a go. Thanks to RhoRho

1.Grab the book nearest to you, turn on page 18 and find line 4.
--Umm, i'll edit this later. Not near a book right now.

2.Stretch your left arm out as far as you can.
--I can reach the wall.

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

4.Without looking, guess what time it is?

5. Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
--5:24pm woo!

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
--The sound of water

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
--Just before 6pm, to take our cat to the vets.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?

9. What are you wearing?

10. Did you dream last night?
--no idea, very rarely remember.

11. When did you last laugh?
--About 30 mins ago

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
--General bathroom type stuff

13. Seen anything weird lately?
--Well I am naked right now....

14. What do you think of this quiz?
--Pretty good.

15. What is the last film you saw?
--Umm, about 15 mins of The Departed.

16. If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?
--Nintendo :)

17. Tell me something about you that I dunno.
--God, Where do I start!

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
--I would change the human race

19. Do you like to dance?
--Depends on how drunk I am

20. George Bush

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
--Umm, dunno. Only good with pet names. Any child I have will hate me.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
--Every winter

24.What do you want GOD to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
--why?....just, why?

25. 4 people who must also do this meme in their journal.
--i'm not that cruel, do it if you want.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006


Yes. Blame the little white box on the lack of posts the last few days.
I'm an addict. Pure and simple.
It'll only get worse mark my words. As soon as it comes out we're treating ourselves to a Wii for christmas.
Although I suppose I could just then blog on my Wii. Got my DS working with my wireless connection so me and Zara are having great fun losing to people all around the world at Mario Kart and Tetris.
Good times.

So now here I sit getting slightly chilly in the bath.
Damn you small inferior hot water tank.
It's starting to get way too cold here now. And winter has yet to arrive.
The winter wollies will be out soon.

On a happier note. My blog has made it onto, yay.
Fame and fortune can not be far away now.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Nightime visitors

Despite all the fireworks and noise life still goes on as normal for some furry and not so furry creatures.

As well as all our pets we tend to feed the local wildlife as well.

Saturday, October 21, 2006


I fucking hate this time of year
All the little retards are wetting themselves over the fact they can let off fireworks whenever and wherever they want.
Even in the middle of the day.
Which I guess goes some way to show their mental ability.
I blogged about this last year. And I guess it's something that will piss me off every year, so here it is again

Why the hell shops are allowed to sell fireworks to anybody other than organizations is beyond me.
Other than the fact the government would miss out on the extra revenue I guess.

Our cat freaks out everytime one goes off.
Fireworks, bonfires. I could really live without this 'tradition' which has very little meaning left behind why we celebrate the 5th November.

It happened over 400 years ago people. Time to move on.

Guy Fawkes must be turning in his grave!

Friday, October 20, 2006

It's Here!

Today is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday

Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don't give a damn about?

Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you?

Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty, you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious,when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it?

Well, on behalf of IkeTurner, I am so very very glad to officially announce today as SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY! There are the rules you must follow:

* You can only slap one person per hour - no more.
* You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day.
* You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-workers take their turns slapping the irritant.
* No weapons are allowed...other than going upside somebody's head with a stapler or a hole-puncher.
* CURSING IS MANDATORY! After you have slapped the recipient, your"assault" must be followed with something like "cause I'm sick of your stupid-a$$ always messing up stuff!"

* If questioned by a supervisor or police, (if the supervisor is the irritant), you are allowed to LIE, LIE, LIE! Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that you want to slap the living day lights out of and get to slapping.....

...and believe me. I was so tempted!

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Monday, October 16, 2006


It's Monday.
I'm feeling lazy.
So I blatantly stole this from Gemmak.
Which is fine as she stole it too.

1. A Cuddler? Yes
2. A morning person? Yes, Damnit!
3. Are you a perfectionist? Kinda
4. An only child? I am now :(
5. Catholic: NO!
6. In your pajamas? Do I look like i'm 5?
7. Currently suffering from a broken heart? Nope
8. Okay styling other people's hair? Define style
9. Left handed? No
10. Addicted to MySpace? Not so much
11. Shy around the opposite gender? No.
12. Loud? No

12. Bite your nails? No
13. Get paranoid at times? At times
14. Currently regret something that you have said/done? No
15. Curse frequently when you get mad? Constantly
16. Enjoy country music? No
17. Enjoy jazz music? No
18. Enjoy smoothies? No
19. Enjoy talking on the phone? Sometimes
20. Have a lot to learn? And then some!
21. Have a pet? A few :)
22. Have a tendency to fall for the "wrong" person? Has been known
23. Have all your grandparents died? No
24. Have at least one sibling? -
25. Have been told that you are smart? Yes, believe it or not!
26. Have had a broken bone? Yes
27. Have Caller I.D. on your phone? No

28. Changed a diaper? Urgh, yes
29. Changed a lot over the past year? Yes
30. Had friends who have never seen your natural hair color? Yes
31. Had surgery? No
32. Killed anyone? Not yet!
33. Had your haircut within the last week? Noooo

1. Slept in the bed beside you? My girlfriend, Zara
2. Saw you cry? Zara
3. Went to the movies with you? Umm, Zara
4. You went to the mall with? As Above
5. You went to dinner with? Zara and my mum..
6. You talked to on the phone? Workmate
7. Said 'I love you' to you and meant it? again, Zara
8. Broke your heart? Nicole
9. Made you laugh? Zara

1. Pierce your nose or tongue? Nose already pierced so i'll go with tongue
2. Be serious or be funny? Funny
3. Drink whole or skim milk? Skim
4. Die in a fire or drown? Drown
5. Spend time with your parents or enemies? Parents

1. What time is it? 18:57
2 Name? Patrick
3. Nickname(s)? Paddy
4. Where were you born? Germany
5. What is your birthdate? April '70
6 What do you want? More Nintendo DS games!
7. Where do you want to live? Somewhere warm, but not hot
8. How many kids do you want? None

Friday, October 13, 2006

The Day

18 December 1972 ~ 13 October 1999

A heart of gold stopped beating
two shining eyes at rest.
God broke our hearts to prove,
He only takes the best.
God knows you had to leave us,
but you did not go alone-
for part of us went with you,
the day He took you home.
To some you are forgotten,
to others just part of the past,
but to those of us who loved and lost you,
the memory will always last.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Really flying

Wow, where has this week gone!

Can't believe it's Thursday all ready. My nice relaxing week is nearly over.
Then back to the cruddy, boring normality of work.

Haven't posted all week, which I know will not please some people. And this one is going to be a bit short as i'm pretty tired.

Had a great day today. Me n Zara went flying with my dad.
Video was taken, photo's were shot.

I'll try n post a couple of the good ones.
Had a go at the controls, and managed to keep us in the blue bit and avoid hitting the green bit.

Hence my ability to post here.

Tomorrow should be fun as I have to try and control Zara and my mum in a HobbyCraft center.

I think flying the plane will turn out to be easier.

Monday, October 09, 2006

Happy 10th Birthday me!

Yes, I`m 10 years old.

Last month, on the 7th September 1996 I made my first ever impression on the internet. On a pet newsgroup.
And then again on the 8th in the same thread as I buggered up my first post.


I have gotten slightly better since then. Can`t believe it`s been 10 years. Slightly over maybe as my first foray into the online world was through Compuserve on my dad`s blisteringly quick 486.

Then I managed to talk my (then) wife into getting connected with a 14,400 modem. On my Amiga. Good times.

A lot has changed in the last 10 years. More than I thought possible. I'm gonna have to dig out some old photos from 10 years ago.

See if i`ve changed as well.

Sunday, October 08, 2006


I think i'm coming down with something.
All the signs are there. The signs Zara had before she got ill. And has now passed on said contagion to me.

Hopefully it won't come to anything. I haven't been ill in a long time. I was always catching colds as a kid. But as i've got older (but not necessarily grown up) i've become a bit hardier to the little beasties that try and infect me.

I'm on holiday for the next week, I can't decide if getting ill is good timing or bad.

Again, hopefully it won't come to anything.

So i'm going to have as relaxing a week as possible. Until Friday anyway. Which probably doesn't mean a lot to people who don't read this often. Or don't know me.

You'll find out if things get too much and a sudden rush of emotion comes out via the keyboard (read back to this time last year if you really want to know).

I'm doing a little better this year for some reason. Up 'til now. Not so many downs. But i'm trying not to let things prey on my mind.

A nintendo DS is wonderful for occupying your mind!

My brother would have loved it :(

Damn, there I go. First crack in the armour.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

It's back

To stop the complaints from people i've got Haloscan working in beta blogger.
And when I say people I mean Zara.
And when I say I got it working I mean I found a website explaining what to do.

So there you have it.

No excuses for not commenting.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006


I've bottled it up long enough. Well, actually I haven't 'cos I tend to rant to Zara about him...but anyway, today was extra special.

There's this guy.

Wow, now that sounds gay! Ok, there's this workmate. He's only been working for us about a month. But been working in the industry about 7 years. But, well, how can I put this.

Chocolate fireguard
Chocolate teapot
Ashtray on a motorbike
Fart in a paperbag

All the above are more useful than this guy.

I try to talk to him as little as possible. But in a place with only half a dozen people in it; that makes it kinda difficult.


Him: So do you like listening to Christina Aquawhatsherface (ok, I made thayt last name up, but you know who I mean)
Me: Not really, she's damn sexy tho.
Him: Yeah, what about Bouncy (Beyonce, or whatever her name is)
Me: Umm, no.

Him: Where's the chair? (there's a chair out in the factory for us to use, but I nicked it and put it in my work room)
Me: In my room (which you should already know as you saw me sitting on it before tea break)
Him, Oh, what's it in there for.
Me: What the hell do you think it's in there for...decoration!
Me: *leaps over workbench to batter muppet senseless*

Ok, maybe the last two bits didn't happen...but it was close.

Now, I guess he was probably just trying to make conversation. But i'm not the chitty chatty kind of person. But he doesn't seem to take the hint.

And...he doesn't really seem to take in my, um, natural surroundings.

I have long hair
I have piercings and tattoos
I generally wear linkin park, Limp Bizkit t-shirts
I wear a Deftones hooded top

Do I look like the kind of person to listen to Be-bloody-once. Or be interested in the fact you went to see Kylie last year.

I must sound like a right twat talking about him like this. But if you had to work with him 8 hours a day you'd understand. I think most workplaces have at least one person they could do without.

Maybe i've been that person!

Meh, such is life. Ok, i'm done.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Cake Tuesday

It's back.

By popular demand. And yet again Zara had to remind me it's a Tuesday. So I guess Dr hoojamaflip`s Brain Training isn't working yet.

It's Cake Tuesday.

Monday, October 02, 2006


Well as usual i've left my posting until as late as possible and now I'm being...umm, what's the word. 'Asked' if i'm getting out the bath soon.

Someone is wanting to get tea started methinks. Monday has been a bit...umm. That's the best way to describe it really. Umm.

Nothing really happened. Nothing wound me up. Nothing pissed me off. I guess nobody was awake enough this Monday to cause me grief. I'll have to watch the news later to see if anything happened.

Maybe the rest of the world had an umm day. I'll switch on the tv and find the news reporter sleeping at their desk.

Ok. Now, this isn't a complaint, or a moan or a gripe about the lack of comments I get. I'm rising above all that...for now anyway.

But Zara did 'mention' that she was unable to post a comment today. Anybody else having problems? Anyone know how to get haloscan working in blogger beta?

Email/skype or send me and odeo message of you have anything to say..those buttons are there on the right for a purpose people...use em!

Well on that happy note I shall depart dear reader.

Todays High: 29 on Brain Age, woo.
Todays Low: Bluetooth not working on my laptop, damnit.

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Blue, Black, Red, Blue...BLUE!

Thats all I can hear at the minute. Zara's shiny new black Nintendo DS arrived today. So there'll be no more squabbling between us over who gets to play with mine.

Hmm, dirty innuendo moment there.

Anyway, Dr Whatshischops Brain Training is getting pretty addictive. Our brains are both in their 30's now. Although mine has been as young as 29. Of course if you've never played this game before you're really gonna wonder what the hell i'm on about.

Update: Zara's brain is now 37...she is NOT happy.

So as you can tell we've both gone DS mad. And any spare cash is being sucked up into the Nintendo pot. We we're both sat in the living room earlier 'chatting' to each other via our DS's.

Geeky and sad you may say. And I would have agreed with you before i'd paid a visit to the library.

After a hard mornings work earning more DS game money I popped into the library to renew a book i'd taken out 2 weeks ago. A typically geeky book on Linux. Anywhoo, this guy infront of me who looked like King of the geeks was getting a book out.

The big book of Sausages.

WTF! he looked quite excited with his librarial (if that isn't a word then it is now!) find. I tried to avoid eye contact in case he spied me looking at his sausage-esk bible and regaled me in stories of his sausaging.

Ok, sexual innuendo detector on overload now!

I'm babbling now. I guess this is what happens when you don't post for a few days.

And I haven't even got onto ranting about how people have no idea about the highway code and that trying to get through a gap past a parked car whilst i'm barreling towards them in my big white van is pretty low on the list of 'good ideas'

...and breath...

Right, I feel better for that.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006


No, not me. Time.
Can't believe the last time I posted was Sunday. And by the lack of comments and emails I've had I guess nobody gives a toss.

Well, humph to to you all. I don't care cos i've got my ds lite. I currently have a brain age of 36. Although maybe that should be 6 as i'm having great fun playing Lego Star Wars.

And...that's about it. I could rant about work I guess. Although i've just done that to Zara so it's all out my system now.

If I think of something to complain about i'll be back!

High: Seeing how much money we have in the bank!, yay to having 2 jobs on the go!
Low: The people I have to suffer at work.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Young at....brain?

The lack of posts the last couple of days can be put down to one thing.

Nintendo DS.

In a fit of spending fury I threw caution to the wind and credit card to and ordered a lovely white Nintendo DS white.

For a bargain price of £109 with a copy of Dr thingumyjig's Brain Training I couldn't put if off any longer. And after 2 days brain training i`ve gone from having the brain of a 72 year old to that of a 33 year old. I'll let Zara comment on her progress...hehe.

So is it any good? Well after about an hour showing it off to my parents they were straight onto amazon to order one for themselves. Family get togethers are going to get a lot more interesting.

But now I have a headache. I think i've stretched my mental capacity too far. Which doesn't take too long. By the end of the week my brain should be that of a new born baby. So i'll be dribbling and cooing by the weekend.

Which is pretty much how I end up after a few too many.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

End Dolphin Slaughter in Japan

During drive hunts, migrating pods of dolphins and other small whales are first panicked and confused by loud banging, then herded, by the hundreds, into shallow coves and butchered, one by one, by fishermen. Every year, some 20,000 small cetaceans of several species, some of which are endangered, including bottlenose dolphins, striped dolphins, spotted dolphins, Risso’s dolphins, short-finned pilot whales, white-sided dolphins and false killer whales, are killed or taken in the drives, sometimes illegally.

Click on this link to go sign the petition to end this mindless practice.

Don`t argue, don`t ignore it.

Just do it

Wednesday, September 20, 2006


No other excuse for it really. No funny posts, no cute videos. Even worse. No Cake Tuesday!

And just because I couldn't really be arsed. Lethargy has really set in. I haven't been playing any pc games either.

So what is the cause of all this? No idea.
So what have I been doing with my time? Even less of an idea

I'm laid here, as always, in the bath; trying to think what i've done with myself since my last post. My mind is blank. Although that could be put down to the fact I have the worst memory in the world.

As a workmate so crudely put it; 'i'd forget my balls if they weren't in a bag'


So i'm buying a Nintendo DS and that brain training game in a bid to jolly my little grey cells into action. Well, that's my excuse to get a new toy.

By this time next week i'll have the brain of a twentysomething.

No comments on the state of my body please. Yes, i'm looking at you Zara!

Low: Hearing a workmate had fallen from a roof headfirst.
High: Later hearing he'd gotten away with a few scratches.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

No Islamic word for Irony

Words fail me...taken from Washington Post:

NABLUS, West Bank -- Two West Bank Christian churches were hit by firebombs early Saturday, and a group claiming responsibility said it was protesting Pope Benedict XVI's remarks about Islam....

...During a speech in Germany earlier this week, Benedict cited an obscure Medieval text that characterizes some of the teachings of Islam's founder as "evil and inhuman." The pope, spiritual leader of more than one billion Roman Catholics, did not explicitly agree with or repudiate the text...more

My new philosphy of life

Taken from a comment on digg, which isn`t the important bit really. But anyway. A short conversation between Norm & Cliff from tv`s Cheers.

I shall now live by these wise words.

“Well you see, Norm, it’s like this… A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster more efficient machine.

And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”

Friday, September 15, 2006

Ok, now I know!

There is NOTHING you can not buy on the internet. And I found this link on PC World's Top 25 Worst Web Sites in case you're wondering!

Click Here

High: Getting to record something on the new DVD recorder.
Low: Finding out that the damn program I wanted to record wasn't on.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

The stupidity of man

Either people didn't understand Steve Irwin or just didn't care and are using this as an excuse.

From CNN website:

BRISBANE, Australia (AP) -- At least 10 stingrays have been found dead and mutilated on Australia's eastern coast since "Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irwin was killed by one of the animals last week, an official said Tuesday, prompting concerns of revenge attacks on the normally docile fish...more

Lets do the Timeshift again!

Ok, first things first before I forget.

Go say hi to Gina, my new tenant. She has a very colouful blog. And manages to come out with many words of wisdom and things I could never think of saying.

I hope that sentence made sense. I'm sat here with a headache. Not in the bath for a change but sprawled out on the settee. This post would have been made from the bath, but my router keeps having a hissy fit and decides not to let any outgoing connections to the internet. Or to any of my other pc's for that matter.

Anyway, enough of the geekyness. I'm controlling the overwhelming urge I have right now to record programmes off the tv. Doesn't matter what it is. But it just needs to be recorded.

Our dvd/hdd recorder arrived today...yay. And it is good. Up to 200 hours of God knows what will be clogging up the hard drive in no time. So the new series's of Stargate and Battlestar Galactica had better hurry the hell up and start soon!

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Cake Tuesday

My Spidey senses tell me I haven`t posted these cake pics before...heh.

So here you go.

Spiderman, Spiderman.
Does whatever a spider can....etc, etc

Todays High/Low

High: Getting to start my new Simon Scarrow novel.
Low: Working from home until 9pm, urgh.

Sunday, September 10, 2006


Apart from the gentle hum of the computers and the dulcet tones of Miaow snoring the house is in silence.

Me n Zara aren't talking.

Blame the sink. If it hadn't been all gunged up then none of this would have happened.
So blame gunge really I guess.
Oh, and lack of food.
And sleep.
And me being crap at most things involving the house.
And my lousy mood.
Probably brought on by lack of food and sleep.
And the fact we didn't get to buy a dvd recorder for the living room.

So now i'm in the bath feeling low and mad.
Not at anyone or anything in particular. Just that low, empty, dark, aggresive feeling you have when you know you've lost control of the situation and feel like the plane is nosediving towards the ground.

Oh, and the feeling you're making a mountain out of a molehill. But part of you WANTS to make a mountin out of a molehill.

Damn, I feel like i'm copying Bored Housewife's style of writing.
But I like it. It's so much easier than trying to write coherent sentences when all you want to do is unload your brain.

It's not all my fault. If Zara wasn't such a fussy bi..girl I wouldn't get so wound up.

So maybe it is all my fault.

I was going to try something new a la Keith & the Girl and at the end of each post type my hi/low. As in what was the high point of my day and what was the low.

Sort of like a summary if you will. See how long it lasts.

High: Setting up my spare pc as a linux file server and getting it all running properly..woo!
Low: Too many to mention today, urgh.

Why Pandas are reluctant to breed!

Make sure your speakers are on for this one!

Friday, September 08, 2006

Thought for the day.

There is more money being spent on breast implants and

Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by

2040 there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and

huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

Thursday, September 07, 2006


I hear ya little fellas.

Work Work Work

I feel old. I ache. I`ve worked 11 hours today and it feels like 20.

And I know what that pretty much feels like. 11 hours isn't the longest I've worked. But it's not something I choose to do.

I don't mind working for a living. But i'll be buggered if i'm living for work.

So now i'm laid in the bath resting my weary bones watching the countdown on my laptops' battery slowly tick down the minutes until it reaches zero then goes to sleep.

I know how it feels.

But I finally got and old pc set up as a file server running Linux.
And i've learnt a few more French words.

So yay me.

I'm sure all this wonderful new information will leak out my ears when i'm sleeping tonight though.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

A Little Late...

..but didn`t really feel it appropriate to add in amongst things like Cake Tuesday et al.

With the world full of so many fuckers why does such a cool guy have to die.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Cake Tuesday

This is quite a plane cake...hur hur

Ahem, anyway. Planes seem to give Zara a hard time in the making. So these are pretty rare designs. Limited only to my dad it seems!

As he loves flying it does make for an easy choice of cake for him though.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

A Weekend In Pictures Pt1

I'm feeling lazy. And as Zara has been going click happy with her new camera then I thought the easiest thing to do would be to just post a bunch of pictures.

I've been so slack in posting things that's been happening. Not that anything earthshattering has been happening, but still.

Anyway, i'm still attempting to learn French. I've been listening to the new Iron Maiden album like mad, and done nothing but eat and drink all weekend with Zara's dad and partner who came up to visit us.

So...on to the pictures!

Animally ones first

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Go Visit!

Ok, halfway through my new tenants term and I finally get round to posting a shoutout.

Been a busy couple of days trying to sort out the possibility of a new job, so my head's in a spin at the minute.

Well, that's my excuse anyway.

So go here and parlay with my new tenant.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Cake Tuesday

Gonna stick with the food theme this's pizza time!

I`m starving, my tum is grumbling and I'm looking at cakes...i need food!

Monday, August 28, 2006


Bank Holiday Monday 2003.
Me and Zara meet for the first time.

Three years later and we're (hopefully) still as happy as the first time we met. Although I'm sure she'll tell you something a little more colourful.

It's amazing the things you find on the internet.

After my marriage broke down, up or whichever direction it goes in. I thought i'd never want to live with anybody else again. I was happy playing the field.

And as with most fields, they have their good parts and their bad, some dry places, and some places crawling with strange little creatures. But in the field was also a beautiful flower that just attracted me from the moment I saw it.

Unfortunately Zara stamped all over it and had stood in it's place by the time I got to it.

Ok, ok, i'm joking. Yes, the flower was Zara. But that little paragraph was getting a little too Mills n Boony.

As as someone who likes a whole lotta time to himself I think Zara deserves a medal for putting up with me for the past 3 years. Although I can say the same also ;)

So how did we spend this most romantic of days?

Buying a network card for the spare pc and struggling to get the miriad of cables under control behind the tv in an attempt to thwart small rodent teeth from reducing a very nice widescreen tv to a box full of bits.

Oh, Zara did also get a nice new digital camera, so everything is getting photographed at 5.1 Megapixels and at 10x zoom.

I got a coaster with a rat picture on it. But it keeps my computer table clean and looks nice.

So I like it.

Happy Anniversary honey.

I love you.

Sunday, August 27, 2006


Well I was gonna type a ton of stuff here. But as usual got sidetracked.

So now I've got to get out the bath and go let the four monster rats out for a run around. Thank God it's Bank Holiday. It takes the two of us to make sure none of them get into any mischief!

I've finally gotten round to stretching my ear piercings...a little at a time. I'd forgotten how much it hurts.

I'll be up to a pitiful 7mm before I know it!

Friday, August 25, 2006

Damn...Zara is NOT going to be happy about this!

The TV networks are quickly becoming clogged with Soaps, Reality TV, Cooking and chat shows. Story taken from Stargate Solutions Blog

Network cancels Stargate SG-1 as 200th episode airs

While fans and the media celebrate the airing of the milestone 200th episode of Stargate SG-1, Solutions has learned from its sources that the SciFi Channel has cancelled the show. The timing could not be worse for such a decision from the network and is sure to rebound on them disastrously in PR terms...more

Thursday, August 24, 2006


This will be my last post for some time. This will come as a shock to some of you, but I have made the monumental decision to take off for the rest of the year.

There are a number of reasons, but the major contributor to my decision has been my involvement with a guerrilla group in Venezuela, which is fighting for freedom and justice against unbelievable odds.

I have been in contact with this group for a number of years by email, and now will finally join them. I know most of you will think I am totally crazy - - but I have not made This decision lightly.

Nothing you can say or do will stop me from doing what I truly believe in. I realize the timing is terrible and my family will suffer - - but I hope to see you again in happier days -when I return from my mission!


Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Cake Tuesday

I`ve left Zara looking after the little monsters downstairs so I have to type this quick before they run rings around her.

Another one slightly dedicated to the rats...cheese!

You could even eat the board and knife.

Only been up 20 mins,,,

but my day has been ruined already, Cat and mouse throwing knives at each other, yeah thats and mouse smoking..oh the horror!!

News Story taken from MSNBC:

LONDON - Turner Broadcasting is scouring more than 1,500 classic Hanna-Barbera cartoons, including old favorites Tom and Jerry, The Flintstones and Scooby-Doo, to edit out scenes that glamorize smoking.

The review was triggered by a complaint to British media regulator Ofcom by one viewer who took offence to two episodes of Tom and Jerry shown on the Boomerang channel, part of Turner Broadcasting which itself belongs to Time Warner Inc....more

Monday, August 21, 2006

I want I want I want

Sigh. So many things. So little money.
I feel Madonna's 'Material Girl' should be playing in the background.
Or at least a blokey version of it. As i`m not a girl. Or gay.

But anyway, The point I was so badly trying to make was...I want...stuff!

Actually it's more of a need than a want. Which sounds slightly less materialistic. Zara's nearly killed her digital camer through overuse. So that's a need. She'll be a nightmare to live with if she can't take her average of a dozen pics a day of the pets.

None of which ever seem to make it onto Flickr. Which is my fault.

And we need a multiregion, 3 in 1 dvd/hard drive/video recorder. As our aging vcr is virtually senile. And has a hissy fit if you try and change the video in it. Of course we could just get a new vcr. but damnit I want to join the 21st century in tellybox recording.

Or something like that.

Oh, but I do want a new Ipod video. Not that i've killed my ipod mini. I just want to watch stuff on my pod at work. But then I DO need someone in the states to record the new series of Stargate and send me the episodes....see, now that's important.

Any paypal donations on offer?

this is for a very good cause.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

New Tenant!

Look right. See. New tenant. Now go visit as she's only here for the week.

Despite the worrying blog name. I'm sure no kittys actually get stir fried. And the fact she has more blogs on the go than can possibly be healthy for you; she seems to be quite a nice tenant.

I'm usually quite hopeless at giving a shoutout to my tenants so hopefully you'll put some traffic her way.

Now i've got my chores out the way I can relax after a hard day (2 hours) stressful DIY. Pictures to follow!

Saturday, August 19, 2006

One man`s nightmare = Zaras Dream

News story from

KENOSHA, Wis. - It might sound like a chocoholic's dream, but stepping into a vat of viscous chocolate became a two-hour nightmare for a 21-year-old man Friday morning.

Darmin Garcia, an employee of a company that supplies chocolate ingredients, said he was pushing the chocolate down into the vat at Debelis Corp. because it was stuck. But it became loose and he slid into the hopper...more

Friday, August 18, 2006

With frickin little plastic bricks

It used to take me long enough to build a spaceship following all the instructions.
And as we sold my Lego stuff on ebay a while back; it still does!

So how this guy managed to recreate New York with the damn things is beyond me.

More New York Lego goodiness can be found here.

Thursday, August 17, 2006


I'm sat on the settee after having a nice hot bath. Typing away on my laptop.
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century is on Bravo channel.
And I have 4 extremely lively rats running round on the floor and trying to scale anything high enough to kill them if they ever fell off.

It's kind of relaxing, and slightly surreal.

We've hopefully won in the battle to make our living room as rat proof as possible. I think you could fill the room full of water and none would leak out. Although i'm sure they'll prove us wrong.
Just when we thought we'd managed to block up the bookcase....after a 2 hour stand off trying to negotiate terms which would satsfy their need to actually go back to their house.

Maria...our slightly chubby brown rat managed to find the smallest hole to crawl through under the fire and into the chimney. Where she proceeded to have lots of fun trying to get out and make her lovely white paws as black as possible.

This has now been blocked off.

And we decided pets would be easier to manage than children because...?

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

All bare

The more astute amongst you may have noticed that my blog page looks a little different. Being the sucker I am to try new things I moved my blog over to the new beta site.

You can't do raw HTML editing just yet so some things like my haloscan comments are missing. But the new elements you can add are really cool. So no doubt i'll be playing like mad and messing my blog up big time.

Oooh, now how should I label this post...hmmm.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Cake Tuesday

In honour of our 4 little furry friends who have been running rings around us and caused us to move the bookcase away from the wall to retrieve one little furry rodent who refused to go to bed. a rat cake.

No, not a cake made out of rats. Although if the little beasts carry on as they are...

..ahem, anyway. The photo in the 2nd pic is of the rats my parents had at the time.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Four things meme

Yeah, thanks gemmak for this ;)

Four Things about me.....

Things you may not have known about me.....

A) Four jobs I have had in my life:

Magazine Layout at printers
Decorative Window Leader
Sorted fruit for yogurts
Packed coleslaw, urgh.

B) Four movies I would watch over and over:

Star Wars (any)
Lord of the Rings

C) Four places I have lived:


D) Four TV shows I love to watch:

Bad Girls

E) Four places I have been on vacation:


F) Four favorite foods:

Fish n Chips
Custard Creams

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Deja Vu

I`ve been trying to write this post since last night.
Various events have been stopping me. Mainly on how to put the jumble of thought in my head into any meaningful coherent sentences.
I`m not sure i`m actually there yet. But the house is empty so I really should make the most of the peace and quiet.

I have a workmate.
This workmate has a friend.
And this friends' brother was killed yesterday in an accident at work.

My workmate was pretty shocked by it all as he had to drive his friend to the hospital, or parents, or something. I can't remember the detail now.

It wasn't like a bolt of lightning hitting me, but slowly through the day little snippets of the past filtered into my head.

I know exactly how this friend is feeling right now. The circumstances may be different. But the emotion is the same. It's the sort of thing you never forget. I can picture exactly where I was sitting when Tina (ex-wife) took the phonecall telling me my brother had been killed. Although the tv was on I cannot remember what program we were watching, which is kinda odd really considering how clear the rest of this image is inside my head.

I remember driving up to my parents house as fast as I could. Even though part of me didn't actually want to see the anguish on their faces.

I remember my mum's face.

I remember we laid in bed pretty much half the night talking about him, drinking whisky until either raw emotion or alchohol made me fall asleep.

I remember how the days and weeks and months afterwards all merged together. How nothing mattered. Everything seemed so trivial. I was floating. It all felt so...surreal.

I remember seeing my dad cry for the second time in my life. The first being when his mother died.

Momentary flashes of the past kept coming in and out of focus. I tried to help my workmate, advise him on how to help his friend. And if there was anything I could do then just call.

The poor bastard has got everything I went through to come. As far as i`m aware nobody else was involved in this accident though. So at least this friend won't have the overwhelming urge to kill the person who took the life of someone so close.

An eye for an eye right.

That feeling didn't last long fortunately. All part of the anger. The feeling helpless. The wanting for someone to punished. To feel the hurt.

I don't cry now.

Not until something like this brings it all back. Like someone has picked the scab off this raw emotion.

And now the feeling are buried inside me again. Waiting to well up.

I feel calm.
I feel ok today.
I just feel tired.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Another fucked up moment...

...courtesy of the Chinese Government.

Story from

BEIJING (Reuters) - China is to auction licenses to foreigners to hunt wild animals, including endangered species, a newspaper said on Wednesday.

The government would auction licenses based on types and numbers of wild animals, ranging from about $200 for a wolf, the only carnivore on the list, to as much as $40,000 for a yak, the Beijing Youth Daily said...more

Darwinism as its' best

Taken from

RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (Reuters) - A Brazilian man died on Tuesday when he tried to open what police believe was a rocket-propelled grenade with a sledgehammer in a mechanical workshop on the outskirts of Rio de Janeiro...more

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Cake Tuesday

Yes it's that time of the week again.

Although I am getting kinda lazy and letting Zara pic which cake to put up on a Tuesday. But with my terrible memory that's kind of a good thing as i'd probably keep rotating the same half dozen cakes over n over.

Anyway, here's Shaggy and Scooby which she did for a friends' lads birthday. I think. Although I may be wrong on that.

Be comforted in the knowledge that all you get is the cake picture and don't have to put up with my dodgy impression of Shaggy...

...rooby rooby rooo!

Monday, August 07, 2006


Lazy blog moment. Well actually. Lazy blog weekend.
I've been wanting to write stuff down. But it seemed like too much effort to log in. And..well...type.

My mind has been bouncing between being insanely happy with my life, to feeling trapped and not too sure on where things are going.

This usually happens when me n Zara argue. This soon passes onto something more important.
Will she notice if I eat this whole pack of Jammy Dodgers before we go shopping next weekend.

My mind works in mysterious ways. Although usually it just doesn't.
Currently it's in the 'I work at the shittiest place ever. And the first chance I get i'm out the door'. And then it'll pass.

But just recently it's been a bit of a running theme inside my head. Nothing to do with the fact that since nearly every single worker has left i'm the only mug to stay in the place that doesn't belong to the same family.

It's like working with a bunch of inbreeds.

I should just get out.

It's like a have a smeagol/gollum moment.

I should get out/but it's not that bad
The manager is a halfwit/but he's one of the lads, a bit of a laugh
There's better jobs out there/I'm pretty well paid


Friday, August 04, 2006

He's Behind You!!

Video gag in a supermarket - the Grim Reaper appears behind you in line. Look at the expression on the second guy's face. funny bit.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

An apology

For yestrerdays post?
Yeah, right.
I have my principles.

Anyway. Enough of the hate.

No. The apology goes to Garfield. Or in my case a double apology.
It was his 2nd birthday at the weekend.
And we forgot. Not only that but then I forgot to post some pictures of him on his new scratching post. So.


So here he is. Happy Belated Birthday G-Man.

Although he does also owe me an apology for perforating me with his claw as I walked past him.

He was high on catnip at the time so I guess I can let him off with a warning.

Oh and in other news...taken from

Deckchair trapped testicles

A Croatian man got a nasty surprise when he tried to get out of his deck chair and found his testicles had got stuck.

Mario Visnjic had gone swimming naked in the sea at the Valalta beach in western Croatia, reports 24sata.

His testicles had shrunk while in the cool sea and slipped through the wooden slats when he sat back down on his wooden deckchair.

But as he lay in the sun they expanded back to normal size and got stuck between the slats.

He was eventually freed after he called beach maintenance services on his mobile phone and they sent a member of staff to cut the deck chair in half.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Chinks: Overreacting motherfuckers.

Ok, sorry for the abusive title. No. Wait. No i`m not.

Story taken from yahoo news.

SHANGHAI, China - A county in southwestern China has killed as many as 50,000 dogs in a government campaign ordered after three people died from rabies, official media reported Tuesday.

The five-day massacre in Yunnan province's Mouding county spared only military guard dogs and police canine units, the Shanghai Daily reported, citing local media.

Dogs being walked were taken from their owners and beaten on the spot, the newspaper said. Other killing teams entered villages at night, creating noise to get dogs barking, then honing in and beating them to death....more*

*warning: article contains distressing image.

Meet the real me!

Talking Cat
Uploaded by Paddy

Damn site wouldn't play properly with my microphone so I had to use a generic voice.

I sound a bit...girly.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Cake Tuesday

Curse my memory. If it wasn't for Zara reminding me what day it is we'd be getting Cake Wednesday...then Cake Thursday..then, well you get the idea.

So on that's Shrek!

This is why I don`t have kids!

Need I say more.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

One Question I.Q Test

There is a mute man who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth, he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is completed.

Now, there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses. How should he express himself?

I`ll post the answer in the comments later on. If nobody else gets it right that is!

Friday, July 28, 2006

You Can Talk To Me!

Ah, any excuse to use a Stevie Nicks song as a title.
Well, i`ll probably stick this button somewhere on the right hand side of my blog where i`ll get lost amongst the rest of the crap I have down there.

But until then it`ll sit here.
And probably end up being in every post I write until someone sends me an audio message damnit.

Well here it is.
It`s not scary.
It doesn`t cost you anything.
So go record me a message.

Send Me A Message

Oh, you do need a microphone tho.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Cake Tuesday

Ok, i`m being to do a Cake Tuesday post.

So here it is. Based on Terry Pratchett`s Discworld novels. Which both my mum and I are huge fans of. So Zara did this for my mum`s birthday.

So there.
My work is done.
I can go lay on the bed and melt in this bloody heat now.